From all my lame defeats and oh! much more
From all the victories that I seemed to score;
From cleverness shot forth on Thy behalf
At which, while angels weep, the audience laugh;
From all my proofs of Thy divinity,
Though who wouldst give no sign, deliver me.
Thoughts are but coins. Let me not trust, instead
Of Thee, their thin-worn image of Thy head.
From all my thoughts, even from my thoughts of Thee,
O thou fair Silence, fall, and set me free.
Lord of the narrow gate and the needle’s eye,
Take from me all my trumpery lest I die.
-C.S. Lewis “The Apologist’s Evening Prayer”
This beautiful poem reflects what the apologist should be thinking once all his arguments are wrapped up and he goes back to his home. Though he has tried to represent God and defend him with the most brilliant of arguments, the apologist should still recognize that because he is human, he will never have all the answers. God is God, and we are not